There are many rules that army players stick to, such as the rules surrounding invasion scheduling or requesting judges. Outside of these official league rules, there are plenty of unwritten rules that everybody must follow!
Before reading, note that this post is purely for fun. Specific individuals and armies are mentioned in this text and it is not intended to offend those individuals or armies. This post is merely about having fun! It does not represent the views of the Club Penguin Armies organisation or its staff team.
I present to you the unofficial Club Penguin Army rules that everybody follows:
Thou Shall Not Troop Steal
We all know how butthurt army leaders get when Robloxfan1 leaves their army to join another. When recruiting, double-check and TRIPLE-CHECK your mutual servers with the potential recruit. By the time you triple-check, I’m sure another army recruiter will have already stolen them. Although troop stealing has benefits, only do this if you feel like starting a two-month war with no victor!
Judges Must Be Biased
How could your army possibly have lost the battle? Your army is the best. It’s the one you chose, and no army could even come close. Despite having over 20 less than the opposition, you were faster (no, you weren’t), and your formations were much cleaner (you’re not anywhere near big enough to circle the Ice Berg)—an outrage. The only possible explanation is that Spotty and Club Penguin Army Judges are biased against your army and YOU.
Thou Shall Not Follow the Army Registration Layout
League rules are far too complicated. There’s a format for everything like scheduling invasions, renaming your servers, or getting your dang army approved in the first place! However, it’s a tradition now that you must NOT follow the format when registering your army. After all, you’re the leader; nobody tells you what to do!
You Must Contest All Losses
Following on from that impossible loss, you absolutely must contest the results. After all, what do you stand to lose? We all know the judges are biased, so the review should favour you. Should the results be upheld, you can always leave the league and declare independence (before inevitably re-registering a month or so later).
Only ‘Gang-Up’ Wars Are Permitted
Wars and battles are what Club Penguin Armies is all about. If you aren’t battling, are you an ‘army’ or more of a stamp group? Despite that fact, several of the latest conflicts have had two or more armies ‘ganging up’ on a separate army, leading me to the conclusion that one-on-one wars are outlawed. After all, who needs a one-on-one when tournaments exist?
You Aren’t Pinging Enough
Everybody loves everyone pings. It’s an excellent tool for letting your server members know something important, like the next event or announcing the server to log on to. However, if you feel nobody got the message, you should take the Elite Guardians’ approach. The following screenshot is from just one event, but viewer discretion is advised as it is horrifying.
I’d argue that even this is not enough. More pings! The entire world of Discord should know when your event is starting.
For newer players, that’s you caught up with the rules we must follow during our stay in the community. These are just a select few of the unwritten Club Penguin Army rules. Should you have any more you’d like to discuss, please drop me a ping (or 152) in the general channel, and perhaps there will be a sequel to this post with the best community submissions.