KLONDIKE, CP Army Headquarters – As the Post Malone Army recently loses its final server, and announces shutdown following TheMightyA’s retirement, the People’s Imperial Confederation find themselves named the victors of the Fall Apart War with a force treaty.
On September 14th, 2021, People’s Imperial Confederation leader Shallissa, in a post entitled “Better Now”, announced that the People’s Imperial Confederation have been declared victors of the Fall Apart War against the Post Malone Army.
The People’s Imperial Confederation first declared war on the Post Malone Army on July 30th 2021, alongside their allies, the Smart Penguins‘ declaration on the Golden Troops, forming the Imperial Intelligence Alliance. This war was exacerbated by rising tensions between the PIC and the Golden Troops following battles during CPAHQ’s Project: Conquest.
On August 19th, 2021, the Golden Troops, in a surprising turn of events, would announce an invasion of the Post Malone Army, an army many considered to be a colony of the Golden Troops.
(19th of Aug in EST)
In retaliation, the People’s Imperial Confederation would declare war against the Golden Troops on the same day, believing that the Golden Troops’ recent invasion was an attempt to salvage land from the PMA.
On August 20th, 2021, the Smart Penguins would sign a ceasefire with the Golden Troops following a war score of 6-3 to the Smart Penguins that would prevent either army from invading each other until December 1st, 2021, leaving the PIC to fend off the Golden Troops and PMA alone. The Smart Penguins would then enter a state of lockdown.
Since then, the Golden Troops have continued to invade both the People’s Imperial Confederation and the Post Malone Army.
On September 10th, 2021, the Golden Troops would successfully acquire the last piece of PMA land East Shoreline, officially rendering PMA land-less.
Much was unknown about how this would affect the results of the ongoing Fall Apart War between the PMA and the PIC. Traditionally, the army acquiring the last piece of land of another in a war would be declared the victors of the war, allowing the victors to subject them to a force treaty. However, considering the unique circumstances, it was unknown if the PIC would be given such a luxury.
On September 12th, 2021, following the retirement of TheMightyA, GT leader and PMA creator, the Post Malone Army announced their shut-down.
On September 14th, 2021, the People’s Imperial Confederation were officially declared the victors of the war against PMA, subjecting the PMA to the following force treaty:
Amidst the high number of dual enlistments between the Post Malone Army and the Golden Troops, and in consideration of the second term banning the attendance of any PMA enlistees in any invasions against the PIC and their allies, it will be interesting to see how this would affect the ongoing PIC vs. GT war.
PIC’s most recent defense of Pine Needles against GT
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In hopes to further understand the circumstances behind the ruling of the force treaty, as well as whether the terms would apply to the ongoing war with the Golden Troops, CPAHQ reached out to Legoman and Shallissa, PIC commanders, for an interview.
What were the reasons behind the initial war declaration against the Post Malone Army?
Legoman: My apologies, I just finished performing one-hundred pendlay rows with a 100LB straightjacket-style weight vest draped across my broad sturdy shoulders. The People’s Imperial Confederation initially declared on the Post Malone Army because this community has proven to be stagnant and dull with very few armies seeking out warfare. The People’s Imperial Confederation is not stagnant and dull, we are based and have great jawlines.
Shallissa: PIC was invited to declare war on PMA by our allies the Smart Penguins from the Imperial Intelligence Alliance who were planning to declare on Golden Troops. Considering just weeks prior to this invitation our alliance with Golden Troops abruptly ended on bad terms, we decided that war would be a great opportunity for our army. Also, Kattle was being annoying.
Despite the Golden Troops officially being the ones to acquire PMA’s Capital, the People’s Imperial Confederation have been ruled the rights to force treaty the army. Would you be able to shed some light onto this?
Legoman: We had been engaged in a state of war with these absolute doo doo dunderheads for over a month, so it seems futile to not give us the force treaty we have earned through our vast conquest of the Motley Crue. This is especially present when the Golden Troops invaded their own proxy in a scallywag manner to attempt to dodge league rules, which to be described in a word is “goofy.”
Shallissa: Funny story! Throughout this entire war we have seen nothing but constant attempts from PMA/GT to find loopholes in terms and organization rules to avoid war and an inevitable force treaty from PIC. We have sat back for weeks watching GT invade their proxy and basically doing all of our work for us. Despite their invasions there was never an active war between GT and PMA, only invasions. CPAN rules state that during war when an army loses all of their servers they will be subjected to a force treaty. Well, regardless of who invaded their capital PMA lost all of their servers. After a CPAN staff vote everyone was in agreement that PIC had defeated PMA in the Fall Apart War, thus subjecting PMA to a PIC force treaty.
Are the People’s Imperial Confederation satisfied with the results of the war?
Legoman: As satisfied as I was when I broke the world record for most single-arm pushups done in a five-minute timespan. My gargantuan arms were howling like ferocious wolves at this exceptional victory, the excitement I felt was unparalleled.
Shallissa: The People’s Imperial Confederation is more than satisfied with the results of this war. We deserved the win with a war score of 10-1 and our troops are incredibly eager to keep up this energy in our fight against the Golden Troops. The icing on the cake though was seeing PMA leadership leave our force treaty group chat one by one, with no one signing or agreeing to it. The hardest part of this war has actually been getting PMA to battle us. Their constant attempts to find loopholes made it hard to keep a steady war pace, so finally getting to present them with that treaty after they tried SO hard to get out of it was very satisfying.
Amidst the high number of dual enlists between the Golden Troops and the PMA, does this force treaty affect the ongoing war in any way?
Legoman: Indeed it does, half of their five troops are no longer eligible to attend due to affiliations with the Post Malone Army throughout the war effort. I am excited to face these brave two and a half troops on the battlefield for the lengthy remainder of this painstaking and tedious conflict.
Shallissa: Considering the GT war is a separate and ongoing conflict, our terms regarding their dual enlisted leadership/members do not apply to that war. Those dual enlisting terms do however apply to any additional proxies, colonies, or dual enlisted armies they may use or create in order to battle PIC or our allies before our treaty expires. They can attend against us in GT but not in any other army.
Are the PIC confident in your future war efforts against the Golden Troops?
Legoman: As confident as I was when I annihilated the Crystal Cowboys off of the face of CPA. Which can be read more on my eloquent and charming wiki page. (HOO RAH)
Shallissa: Yes, absolutely.
Do you have anything to add?
Legoman: This is community voted Best SM Leader, Best Organization Head, Best Templars Allied Leader, Best ACP Ally, People’s Imperial Confederation Commander-In-Chief and Premier of the Congress of Soviets, big muscle man, Wiki-Page enthusiast, possible narcissist and local hottie LEGOMAN telling you all to eat your vegetables, mow the lawn, have a lovely day and stay golden. Shoutout to local ghost costume enthusiast Stare3000
Shallissa: Golden Troops we’ve prepared a treaty and left a nice spot for your signatures. Hope to see you soon!
Amidst ongoing investigations on possible exaggerations of Legoman’s self-proclaimed physical prowess, the respective interviews further shed light on the ruling of the war, setting a precedent to others that may, in the future, wish to utilize this technicality, whether it is to gain an easy force treaty or for other means. PIC further states that the Golden Troops will be able to continue defending and invading despite the terms of this force treaty, expressing confidence in an impending PIC victory.
As the People’s Imperial Confederation continues to wage war against the Golden Troops, only time will tell whether they can continue their momentum and secure another war victory, or if the Golden Troops can, against stacked odds, turn the tables around and secure victory for themselves.
What do you think about the results of the Fall Apart War? How will this victory affect the PIC’s future pursuits against the Golden Troops? Comment YOUR thoughts down below!
CSY
CP Army Headquarters Editor
